I am in a foul mood today.

I have no idea why, but I am in such a foul mood today. World watch out!

BUT, the good news is that I am now on thyroid medicine and it is actually working!! Hubby calls them my speed balls, b/c I have so much energy now - and I haven't felt like this in over 4 years. I am VERY VERY VERY happy to be more of myself right now. I had NO clue that having a low thyroid could cause depression.

I took these pics yesterday, but i had my settings wrong from my last shoot, and well, they turned out grainy. So my loverly daughter said that she would do it once again since I am holding painting her fingernails green over her head. Because you know that story right? Oh you don't? Let me tell you:

My Dear Sweet Toddler:
You are my world. You rock that you quit biting your nails to have me polish them. I am not so happy you choose green for a color, but completely understand that you want to look like the wicked witch in the Lizard of Loz, and that you want the green nails to match your green Christmas eve dress that you wear every. single. day.

HOWEVER- last night when you directly disobeyed me and opened the polish behind a closed bathroom door, and painted three nails and conveniently dropped the green polish on our carpet, I was not amused.

We were going to replace the carpet with tile anyway, so that isn't a big deal, but please try not to disobey me. Nail polish, especially some obnoxious bright green polish, is for mommy to open.

love, mom.

anyway, she got in trouble, so now i am using it to my advantage and as another incentive for being good. She is at her school now, and we will get her at 11:30, eat lunch, take photos, paint nails and then she will go down for a nap - or at least that is how I am envisioning it. lol.

hi. it's me.

so i started my cholesterol meds last night. i feel horrible for doing it. i feel like a failure b/c I couldn't get the stupid number down on it's own. So I am here to reveal my cholesterol numbers:

6 mos ago, 250 - not so bad, and thought I could help it.
last week - 275 *insert bawling emoticon here*

so, on the meds i go. not happy, nor am i doing it willingly other than the fact that I WANT to be around for my family.

so tonight, i sit here by the compy with a glass of wine and trying to fix some photos to get printed. what a life :)

dude, read your emails

so i sent my mom an email about an oncology appointment that i have.

it turns out it is today and that vince ie either sick or teething. she informed me last night that she made lunch plans for today.

I sent her an email the day I scheduled this, which was late december. she blamed it on not having a calendar.

i can't bring him - you can't bring germs into a place that takes away your immune system. Not to mention, this dr is NEVER on time and if I have to wait in an enclosed room for 2+ hours, i might just become an alcoholic.

ugh, i have to reschedule, FOR THE THIRD time in the past year....

and not to mention, she has yet to watch the kids once a week, i think maybe she has watched them like 3 times since she asked this.

i am so frustrated today...

holy cholesterol batman

so my cholesterol is high. well, high is an understatement. i am now going on meds. the following is also what i am going to do as well -

limit red meat consumption - which I already do.
eat oatmeal every day
eat a salad a day too - b/c pure olive oil is good to lower cholesterol
no cheese, only mozzerella. this is the part that will SUCK.
wine - drink wine, red wine - 1 glass a day. WOOHOOO!!! :)

i have already started cooking in my home, and using sprays or baking and it is mostly chicken that we eat. i think i am just doomed. we have cut out most carbs (i rarely eat pasta anymore) and well, ugh. i think it might be somewhat genetic. both parents are on medicine and i had high cholesterol growing up. so um, crap. that's all i have to say....crap.

freaking out about a 16you coming over....

so we are having a babysitter come over this friday night ad we are going to the governor's ball. this girl is an only child, a neat freak, and well, our house is FAR from neat and organized.

i am thinking of asking my aunt to watch them (for money) and telling the girl that all my cousins asked em to go hang out for the evening. I just don't know what to do - i am sick to my stomach.

i know, i know, i shouldn't be freaked about a 16 yo, but seriously - this girl came to the mtn house two weeks ago and sat there telling us what a pig her uncle's girlfriend is and then detailed EVERYTHING wrong with her house. (left overs in her fridge, her cabinets weren't organized, her towel was dirty,) proceeded to tell us that she won't spend the night at any of her friend's house because they don't clean their sheets properly and their rooms are dirty.

this girl is literally going to shit when she comes over here. like, our house might send her into a mental institution. i am not perfect. our house is messy with toys and clutter crap, but our counters, bathrooms and such are spotless (as i am a semi-germaphobe after being sick)

omg, help me - i can't believe i am freaking out about this....

holy crap.

so i have two blogs, one public and this one is unedited. so sometimes you will see similar content, but i would read this one as it will have more.

Hubby's job SUCKS ASS. there is no way to put it. his boss is a prick. he worked until 10 pm last night, and then his boss called him on the way home and he said so you will be at X place early right?!?! He said, no, i will be there around 9/9:30. AND HIS BOSS WAS APPALLED THAT HE WOULDN'T BE IN UNTIL THEN. no words to express how i feel on that one.

Did I also mention that I am a sucky sahm? I was so not cut out to be a house keeper. THANK GOD it isn't the 1950's or someone would commit me to the mental hospital for lack of care of a house.

i can't say what I am doing, because my days go by so fast I have no clue what I do. All I know is that my kiddos are really happy, and that's all that matters.

So, we started our HUGE overhaul of our house to get it into real estate market shape. This plain just SUCKS. I can't tell you how much it sucks. We have so much, for lack of better words, shit in this house. I wish I could make it magically disappear just like samantha on bewitched, but alas, I do not have magical powers.

Therefore, we are sorting much like that TLC show where they came in and organized everything. yes, we are going through every room, putting all the crap into a bin and moving it to the dining room. Getting that room organized, and then moving stuff back in. My goal is to only move 1/3 back in, put NO MORE than 1/4 in storage, and toss/donate/burn the rest.

We just can't deal with being so unorganized, and boy is it hard. My only frustration is that hubby doesn't want to learn where anything goes (kids clothes, toys, towels, his own clothes) so that leaves me with the entire house. Much to my dismay.

I am sure he will come around in the next 15 years, but for now he has to focus on his job as it is quite demanding and challenging right now. So me, the ever so crappy housewife, gets to clean the entire house, solo. Oh, and maintain it too, that's always a fun and never-ending job.

To my friends whom i have ignored, my apologies. I just can't wrap my arms around what we need to accomplish. I promise I will return soon. :)