I think i have to bend over....
and take it. I am hopefully going to be able to muster up enough guts to ask my parents for money tomorrow and I am just sick to my stomach at the thought of this.
We have left over cc debt from hubby that we were unable to pay off during his tenure of extensive travel. We paid off 1/2 of the cc's, but we are not gaining on paying them off right now and percentage rates on EVERYTHING in our world is going up - our mortgage (variable rate, i know i know, but we were supposed to be out of here and i can't refy now or we will most definitely lose money) an assessment at our HOA, our HOA in january and the list expands.
We looked through all our bills to see where we can cut back and basically what it boils down to is that we can't turn on lights and use electricity. i clip coupons, i shop at the cheapest places, we don't eat out - well once in a blue moon i go to lunch and pay - ( i do to go lunch frequently, but my mom pays b/c she knows i can't) I told him i could cut out cable and internet, and he said no.
So, I am going to offer 5% interest to my dad along with keeping the total amount available on a cc just in case he should need to liquidate and need the money back. but i put us on a 3 year pay back schedule, to be paid on the 15th of every month. this total is cheaper than what we are paying now, and the interest rate is better than a money market account.
The ONLY issue here is that he has always marched to the tune of i will never help my children financially because that is not my job - which might be why i am having an anxiety attack over this.i just want to cry.
we pay over $800 for insurance per month here,and $25.00 each time we visit a dr. Thats why i hesitate to go and why i have hesitated to go to the oncologist for my check up. we just plain and simple can't afford all these dr's appts. I would go outside his work for insurance coverage, but i won't be abl eto be covered as i am not yet considered "cured" and if i am denied, i will carry a black mark the rest of my life. we don't fight about money in this house, but there is always a looming black cloud 5 days before payday when we need food, toilet paper, etc.
There seems to be no option other than for me to go back to work, and hubby says no way. Not to mention, even if I did get a part time job somewhere, there would be NO WAY that I could do it b/c my parents won't watch the kids and he doesn't come home until 7 or 8 every night. I am tired of being so stressed and sick to my stomach 5 days before every single payday. i am frekaing out about december b/c his parents seem to think we have money and can travel and expect us to come out to cali for a holiday celebration. i barely have enough money to give gifts this xmas to my kids let alone spend 1k that we don't have.
each time we discuss money, then he says okay i will pay more attention and then never does. so i am left to freak every month about money. I think the largest issue here is my pride. I feel BEYOND HORRIBLE for going out to dinner wtih my parents and not paying. I offer, but my dad doesn't take it. But for some reason i feel horrible about this. We are FAR from poor by US standards, but we are seriously middle class poor.
OMG - this turned into a WCP - and long. if you made it this far, thanks for letting me wallow in my self pity today.
We have left over cc debt from hubby that we were unable to pay off during his tenure of extensive travel. We paid off 1/2 of the cc's, but we are not gaining on paying them off right now and percentage rates on EVERYTHING in our world is going up - our mortgage (variable rate, i know i know, but we were supposed to be out of here and i can't refy now or we will most definitely lose money) an assessment at our HOA, our HOA in january and the list expands.
We looked through all our bills to see where we can cut back and basically what it boils down to is that we can't turn on lights and use electricity. i clip coupons, i shop at the cheapest places, we don't eat out - well once in a blue moon i go to lunch and pay - ( i do to go lunch frequently, but my mom pays b/c she knows i can't) I told him i could cut out cable and internet, and he said no.
So, I am going to offer 5% interest to my dad along with keeping the total amount available on a cc just in case he should need to liquidate and need the money back. but i put us on a 3 year pay back schedule, to be paid on the 15th of every month. this total is cheaper than what we are paying now, and the interest rate is better than a money market account.
The ONLY issue here is that he has always marched to the tune of i will never help my children financially because that is not my job - which might be why i am having an anxiety attack over this.i just want to cry.
we pay over $800 for insurance per month here,and $25.00 each time we visit a dr. Thats why i hesitate to go and why i have hesitated to go to the oncologist for my check up. we just plain and simple can't afford all these dr's appts. I would go outside his work for insurance coverage, but i won't be abl eto be covered as i am not yet considered "cured" and if i am denied, i will carry a black mark the rest of my life. we don't fight about money in this house, but there is always a looming black cloud 5 days before payday when we need food, toilet paper, etc.
There seems to be no option other than for me to go back to work, and hubby says no way. Not to mention, even if I did get a part time job somewhere, there would be NO WAY that I could do it b/c my parents won't watch the kids and he doesn't come home until 7 or 8 every night. I am tired of being so stressed and sick to my stomach 5 days before every single payday. i am frekaing out about december b/c his parents seem to think we have money and can travel and expect us to come out to cali for a holiday celebration. i barely have enough money to give gifts this xmas to my kids let alone spend 1k that we don't have.
each time we discuss money, then he says okay i will pay more attention and then never does. so i am left to freak every month about money. I think the largest issue here is my pride. I feel BEYOND HORRIBLE for going out to dinner wtih my parents and not paying. I offer, but my dad doesn't take it. But for some reason i feel horrible about this. We are FAR from poor by US standards, but we are seriously middle class poor.
OMG - this turned into a WCP - and long. if you made it this far, thanks for letting me wallow in my self pity today.
posted by curly @ 11:28 AM
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